Heated Make-Up Sex…Does it add spark to the flame or will it put the fire out?

No matter how healthy a relationship seems, arguments are deemed to happen. When you and your mate are quarreling, the last thing you may be thinking about is taking your clothes off and shagging.

Before you go into the day of giving bae the silent treatment realize that there are plenty of benefits to having makeup sex. Still doubtful that fighting over folding laundry can be a form of foreplay? Well I’ve done My research to convince you otherwise while also helping you avoid the hang up’s.

Make up sex is the intercourse you have after a fight with your partner. Although The idea of sexual intimacy replacing relational tension can be harmful to your relationship long term, engaging in intense lovemaking after a heated or intense disagreement can be a really enriching reminder of the relationship’s love and passion after separation. If though, it becomes a repeated cycle of conflict leading to passion it could cloud the conflict as a means to feel close.

Why does frustration sometimes lead to being horny?

Even a mundane argument can cause you to fill up with adrenaline. Post-fight, your blood is pumping, your heart rate increases and you’re operating at a heightened state of biological arousal.

These reactions are the body’s natural fight-or-flight response, these responses were designed to keep us safe in dangerous situations. On a biological level, arousal is arousal.

We get turned on after a fight due to arousal transfer. The high amounts of emotion and adrenaline you gain while arguing with your partner doesn’t disappear , those feelings can get transferred into sexual arousal.

As the phrase goes “You will become what you practice” For some couples fights can become the normal way to talk about their days, relate to each other about their hopes and dreams, and even engage in foreplay. MOST Couples engage in repeated routines creating the norm for how the dynamic functions. Within sexual connection, tension and release bonding happens and creates a cycle of increased stress culminating in the relationship relying on sex to relieve that tension. Sex in the brain has powerful relaxation and calming effects.

The Upside to Make-Up Sex

• Ease Tension The tension between partners could be resolved by both partners sharing a positive experience together. Sex can help with anxiety. There is no shame in taking a break during conflict and do something that each person enjoys to reconnect, ground the intensity, and later resume managing their conflict. Sex can be a (chemically) powerful & efficient way of relieving tensions than a walk would.
• Restore Faith Sexual intimacy is an intense bonding experience.Sex can rebuild trust and offer assurance in the relationship’s good future. Restored faith could also make sexual feelings stronger for each other as increased security could allow for further sexual intimacy to be accessible and explored.
• Vulnerable Unlocked Makeup sex is a great way to help accept that vulnerability you may feel and remember that one fight isn’t the end of your connection. Becoming genuinely vulnerable with your partner is one of the most crucial building blocks for a solid relationship. If you can’t get there, you may have other issues you need to work out that makeup sex won’t be able to unlock.
• Increase dopamine and improve sleep/MOOD Sex is linked with decreasing anxiety and depression symptoms as well as helping the physical body exist in a relaxed state. By having make up sex, the tension in the relationship that was once there resolves and brings fresh connection that was previously lost in the conflict. Sleep has also been shown to benefit from sex, both in sleep quality and onset and when sex happens at bed time. So snuggle up with your boo after you argue about what to watch on Netflix.

Downfalls to getting Down when your upset

• Sex could be limited to happening only after fights: Having sex after fights could lead the relationship to have fights in order to have sex.
• Avoiding the main issue(s): When sex distracts the relationship from what is going wrong or needs fixing, the relationship could be blind to major issues ahead.
• You could believe problems are really over when they are not: If the relationship uses sex to resolve issues or get past them, but without talking about feelings, triggers and making plans for next time, the relationship is set up to fail again in the future.
• Sex could become associated with fights in the relationship: Having sex after fights could lead to associating sweeter times of connection to fights and not other parts of the relationship like late mornings together, date nights, special occasions, etc.

Bottom Line and Bottoms Up

Within the right scenarios makeup sex has the potential to help improve your relationship after a disagreement. Physically reconnecting with your partner could help break down the resistant barriers that may be blocking ya’ll from finding a resolution.

However, keep in mind it’s a huge red flag if you or your partner is only pushing you to have sex instead of working through your issues together. Be mindful about your kiss and make up rituals and be easy on yourselves and each other.